Introducing...

Hi! I am Peepireepichichisqueak, an extremely fine specimen of the dwarf hamster (The photographs above do not do justice to my great looks). My coat of dense fine fur and bright beady eyes are ever so much superior to the hairlessness and large eyes of my silly mistress, who does not even know whether I'm male or female. Sniff, so she has christened me Hammie as her gross vocal chords cannot pronounce my melodious name, so rich in trills and shrills.

Ah! What exciting tales I can tell you but due to time constraints, I shall only relate my nearly-successful-move-to-the-printer. Discretion is the better part of valour, so despite itching to explore outside my cage (beastly thing), I bided my time and never left the cage while my owner was around. One day, she forgot to shut my cage and left.

Mwahaha! The opportunity I've waited for so long has finnally arrived! I clambered out quickly and scampered all round the table. There were papers with squiggly blue and black patterns on them that gave off an inky smell. There were long, funnily shaped rods. There was an odd rectangle with square buttons on it and another upright rectangle attached to the edge of the first rectangle. There was a strange box next to it with paper sticking out at the main entrance. I think they were called laptop and printer respectively. I wandered into it and wow!

My goodness, the inside of this strange box was dark and inky and wonderfully snug! I bit away the irritating plastic tapes hanging overhead and squeezed in further. This is so much better than my boring cage! I've decided, I shall make this my new home! To make it more comfortable, I shall chew up those patterned papers. This corner shall be where I store my food, the opposite corner my toilet and I shall sleep in front of my storeroom.

I had so much fun decorating my new home!Scampering back and forth between my cage and the printer, reducing the paper into nice bits and arranging them nicely in the dark hole. Halfway through this momentous task, I heard the door creak, my owner is back! I was just going to move more food from my cage to my new home and was standing on my hindpaws when she came in.

Ever resourceful, I glance up at her with liquid eyes and, being the stupid human that she was, she exclaimed,"So adorable!" and put me back into my cage. Then she noticed the paper, the notes she depended on were in a mess. Her eyes widened. Next, she touched my new home and it became alive with lights and sounds. She frowned and looked into the main entrance. She shook it and out poured the paper bits, my food and erm, bodily excretions. I knew I was in terrible trouble when she stomped over to my cage so I curled up into a tiny ball and her face softened(What a thing it is to be cute!) and I was not punished. Sigh, I wished this exploit had a better ending but no matter, I shall triumph the next time. Till then, bye bye!

P.S. My first attempt at a funny entry... Hope it cheers everyone up somewhat!